What Does Being In The Friend Zone Actually Mean
In layman’s terms, it means you’ve dropped the ball, MAJORLY. You will have to come to the bitter/sweet realization that there is no-one to blame for your relocation to the friend zone other than yourself. Continue reading to learn how to get out of the friendzone.
Here’s What You Need To Know
There is not a soul walking this earth that hasn’t been in the friend zone at least once, so you’re not alone. However, this isn’t about self wallowing and motivational pep talks, you’re here to find out how to get out of the friendzone.
1. Come To Terms With The Facts
The fact is, you’re in the friend zone. Live it, love it, breathe it… not that much though. Your presence in the friend zone has provided you with a much-needed wake-up call, and a reason to do some self-reflecting as a result.
Take into consideration that most guys given their current situation end up blaming the girl for their one way ticket. Do not get into the self destructive loop of “She’s made a mistake” or “Later down the road she’ll recognize what a great guy i am and then she’ll want me forever”.
Get your head out of the clouds and accept the truth that she will never magically change her own reasoning for putting you there just because of one interaction you might do in the future.
Come to terms with:
- The reality of your predicament
- No-one has put you there except you
- You will forever be a resident of Hotel Friendzone unless you change your lifestyle, habits, and thoughts.
Do not fall into the loop of thinking:
- All women will not appreciate a great man like you
- It is the fault of players and bad guys
- The world is cruel and not perfect
2. Under No Circumstance Will You Feel Sorry For Yourself
The self pity and wallowing, victimized mindset of a newly friend zoned man will not only serve to turn off women but make your current escape plan that much harder. Any Women will sure as hay not let you out of the friend zone just because they feel sorry for you.
There is no room for any feelings when trudging through the trenches of the friend zone on your way to your grand exit.
Keep a cool head on your shoulders because the more you regret, overthink, or assume, the deeper you will go down this very friendly rabbit hole.
3. There is No Pedestal
No man, woman, or creature objectively ever was or is on a pedestal, no matter how darn attractive they may seem. We all have our problems, lows & highs, and we all put our pants on one leg at a time.
- Seeking your validation through her
- Trying so much what she thinks about you
- Aim to be the nicest guy in the world
Everything stated above you will need to promptly cease as soon as possible. They are a mixing brew of un reachable standards or further negative mindset manifestations.
4. Get Busy, Too Busy, To Get Out Of The Friendzone.
Get busy, no I mean too busy. Find something to turn your energy towards instead of stalking her Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook feeds. Get a life, redirect your mind to positivity. You will never see the light outside of the friend zone if she’s constantly on your mind 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, it will not happen.
“But I Still Have Feelings For Her” – Friend zone guy
This very well might be true but you’ll also have to accept the fact that she has moved on. In this case, the only one you should be redirecting that energy is into becoming the best version of yourself.
5. No Calling and No Texting Out Of The Friendzone
If you ever hope to have the attraction re-sparked down the line you will need to get out of the dm’s ASAP. No over texting, no over calling.
She is less inclined to ever inquire about your well being than she ever was, now will she stay up late worrying that something has happened to you. Get out of the “friend zone routine” it progresses neither you as a person nor the relationship as a whole.
Breaking the routine of calling or texting every day is a must. Thus, you will want her to either recognize your absence or completely disregard it. Either way, you will want to detach as the man she once knew.
Note: Your mindset is not to spite the individual, or reach a new level of pettiness. Rather, your motive here is to re-evaluate your priorities within your own life.
6. You Are Not Her “Girl-Friend”
Any attempts to bridge the gap between you and her by being friendly is a shot to your own foot, and quite frankly that is something you will be needing to exit the friend zone, metaphorically speaking.
You are not the guy:
- To console her through her other guy problems
- Who carries all of her shopping bags on a trip to the mall
- To serves as her private Uber
- Who Constantly concurs/agrees with everything she says does or thinks.
- To invite her on a tea party
- To hold her beverage while she proceeds to dance with another guy
In this scenario, closed mouths don’t get fed. For example it is more beneficial for both parties when upon the next time you meet or even with a future love interest to clarify the following.
“I am not seeking to become your friend or girl-friend for that matter. “
This is your mindset. Women will distance themselves from men who for one, don’t make their true intentions of a romantic relationship clear, deliberately or not.
7. Keep Your Mouth Shut To Get Out Of The Friendzone
You will only futher cement your position as warden of the friendzone when you become a victim to your own emotions and reveal your feelings to the world.
When you follow up with her while in the friend zone confessing your feelings to her and showering her with compliments out of sheer desperation, she will not hesitate to kick back, relax, and eat some popcorn while you throw your friendzone exit key even further away into a pile of snakes this time.
You will not:
- Desperately confess your love
- Shower her with hollow compliments
- Try to manipulate her into feeling sorry for you in any way
- Be so easy, that a gust of wind can swoop you off your feet.
- Ever take your interactions further than she does.
- Reciprocate any ” I like you’s” with ” I like you too” etc. If you find yourself interacting with her.
8. Your Best Self Is The Key, Be “THE MAN”
While your best self may never unlock any future interactions between you and the girl of your interest. You will have opened the door to your own freedom and potential.
This is a crucial time to get your life together. Your desperation conveys only one thing to her. That you have put all of your self-validation into one person, and in doing so have become a stagnant and insecure person yourself.
No matter if your own love interest shifts to another, once you’ve checked yourself into the friend zone you will always be in the friend zone if you remain the same, mentally, physically, financially.
If your romantic interactions were compiled into a book, will it be in the pathetically horrific genre, or the inspiring non-fiction genre illustrating that you will have to fall to soar higher than ever before?
Hit they gym. Hit the books. Travel. Live. Laugh, and prosper.
9. Realize There Never Was Or Never Has Been A Friend Zone
This is the final step of breaking free of the friend zone. Providing yourself to much subconscious comfort in the friend zone itself can promote anguish, depression, and a whole cocktail mix of negativity in your life.
Realize there never was a friend zone to being with, only you. She never threw you there, she never cursed you to live without what you want. The concept of the friend zone itself provides its own mental barrier and can possibly suck any hope of self-motivation there is or lack there of, right out of you forever.
Moreover, due to your own misguided beliefs and strayed mindset, you have formed your own friendly chains and barriers to make the ultimate self wallowing negative persona of hopelessness, and nobody likes those.
Finally, how you would act if there were no concept of the friend zone, no self-put doubts, no assumptions, and no mental barriers is how you should be carrying yourself from here on out.
As a result, this is and always will be your final leg and first step of of the friend zone.
Out Of The Friendzone Review: Part 1
- 1. Come To Terms With The Facts – You’re in the friendzone not because of her but because of you. Be self accountable, noone else is to blame.
- 2. Under No Circumstance Will You Feel Sorry For Yourself – Keep a cool head on your shoulders. If you give into your emotions you will only go down deeper into the rabbit whole of despair.
- There is No Pedestal – She is as human as you and everyone else. Part of the reason why your’e in the friendzone in the first place is because you’ve given her unrealistic standards whether she knows it or not.
- Get Busy, Too Busy – In this case, the only one you should be redirecting your energy is into becoming the best version of yourself.
- No Calling and No Texting – While you don’t have to completely kick her out of your life, she is not the center of it. Girls can smell neediness from miles away. Keep you interactions few and far between at most.
Out Of The Friendzone Review: Part 2
- You Are Not Her “Girl-Friend”- Going along with number 5, don’t act like her girl-friend. Make your intentions so clear she can almost run into them, never beat around the bush with. Note: This is for when you have successfully exited the friendzone.
- Keep Your Mouth Shut – She doesn’t want to here your cries of desperation like you’re a wounded puppy. Keep your mouth shut about how you feel about her, she could care less.
- Your Best Self Is The Key, Be “THE MAN” – Focus on bettering yourself. Clearly she didn’t want anything to do with the guy you were. When you have learned to take care of yourself, then you are ready to take care of another.
- Realize There Never Was Or Never Has Been A Friend Zone – That’s right, it’s all made up. Being comfortable with the concept that your in the friend zone can actually inhibit your abilities to fully recognize your own potential. There never was a friendzone, only you.
If you have read this and still not sure whether you’r even in the friend zone. Checkout The 10 Unmistakeable Signs You’ve Gotten Yourself In The Friendzone.